Growing up so fast!

Doug took some super cute pictures this morning before church. I just really love my kids! Jay looks so grown up somehow in this picture. I think it is because his feet not only touch the ground, but there is a slight bend at the knee. I am constantly amazed at how fast he is growing up (I call it the first child syndrome). His newest "cutest thing to do" is that he will come and stand by me and say, "Mom how tall am I?", so I will measure him and tell him that he is almost up to my arm. He will ask me if he is growing up, and I will assure him that he is getting really big and tall.

One day, I was teasing him and telling him that I did not want him to grow anymore, that I just wanted him to stay little. He got a huge frown on his face and his eyes welled up in tears, and he said, "but Mom, I need to grow up." We had a long talk after that and I assured him that I really did want him to grow up, that I was excited for all the things that he was going to get to do.

Secretly, though, I am a little sad. This is the last year that I will have all my children around me all day long. I know instinctively, that even though I feel my life is pretty busy right now, it is only going to get busier once school starts full time. I love having my kids around me. I know what they are doing, what they are learning, what friends they are making, how they are behaving, etc. (Am I a control freak?, Maybe!) Even when their behavior is less than desirable, I am still fully involved in their lives. Giving up that special time will definitely feel like a loss.

I am just glad that I have one more year to make that break, not because I don't want Jay to grow up and become even more independent, but because I truly just love being his mom and having him around. He is such a good big brother, he is helpful and kind, he loves his baby brother, he is Ellie's best friend, and has such sweet disposition. Jay and I have always had a really special connection and I count having him as my son as one of my most cherished blessings.